TV Commercials Are Full Of Beautiful Women (That Aren’t Celebrities!)

Yes, I seriously dug around the internet for a picture of Zooey Deschanel in a promo for New Girl just to use as a masthead image. Too bad she’s a celebrity and obviously doesn’t qualify under the guidelines of this article! Have you ever stopped a commercial (okay, it’s difficult on live TV, I get it) just so you could see a random pretty girl in an ad that only exists for a fraction of a second? No? Well, I have! And now it’s my time to show off some recent picks from my list of admirable cuties!

The Raven-Haired Storyteller – Walmart Black Friday 2011 Spot

If you were watching anything on TV on Thanksgiving, chances are you saw this spot. Here, she tells her friend about the legendary Black Friday shopper that’s wheeling toward them. “She named her kid Black Friday!” she says out of the side of her mouth as to not draw attention. Adorable.

The Webmaster Lady – Esurance Ads

Let’s be fair, she’s a cutie, but she’s a complete jerk. While on-the-phone dude in the back lets it roll right off when she leaks that he’s a DJ on the weekend, she’s not as nice in other spots. That’s fine, a little feist is all right. Piercing blue eyes punch a hole right through your heart and devour its passion. Well, mine anyway. The pigtails help. She’s actually played by Suzi Barrett of the Upright Citizens’ Brigade (and you have no idea how long it took for me to figure that out).

The Explanatory Classmate – ConocoPhillips Natural Gas Ad

There’s nothing wrong with being a shill for a giant gas company when the paychecks are rolling in. Did you know that natural gas can be harvested with a much smaller footprint than ever before? That’s what she’s here for. For you. To learn. She has a cute friend (or maybe just a casual colleague) in the spot as well, but she wins on two fronts: simply being more adorable -and- not being a clueless college kid that needs the complex dynamics of natural gas harvesting explained to her. Explanatory Classmate has it down.

The Oppressed iPod Listener – Motorola Xoom Super Bowl Spot

While Motorola’s tablet spot was more mimicry than innovation (pale in comparison to Apple’s “1984” ad), it was supposed to be their big unveiling of the new Honeycomb-powered Xoom tablet. And it had The Oppressed iPod Listener, who at passing glance looks a bit like Sarah Michelle Gellar. Is there anything wrong with that? No. Just look at those glassed-over eyes: she wants to belong, to be part of something bigger than she is, to give up her life in that dystopian hell-hole and use an Android tablet with The Dude That’s Different. She’s into that. I can dig that.