Buy A $10 Theme Park For Your ‘SimCity’ Of Broken Dreams

Posted by on May 28, 2013 at 4:32 pm
It's like candy, but then you remember, it's candy.

It’s like candy, but then you remember, it’s candy.

SimCity is like that girlfriend that dumped you and just wants to move on. They still won’t atone for their devious actions, but they want the next big thing out of your non-relationship: money. Enter the new $10 Theme Park DLC for 2013’s most disappointing hooker lousy bitch game, in which you can craft your own Sim Theme Park and build out a Tourism-based city. Not that this is a City you should be touring, yet.

Yes, SimCity maintains its original trajectory of releasing cheesy DLC for $4 more than you can buy RollerCoaster Tycoon for on GOG. Using the game’s snap-to features, you can construct a park within your city that becomes its own mini-game with additional modules only available if your new park can prove that it has the gusto to bring people swarming. On paper, it’s a fantastic idea, but SimCity has yet to earn my love, much less more money, so it gets nothing.

Smarmy move, EA.

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