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Let’s Talk About Survivor – The Most Inaccurate Show Title EVER?! I Think So!

Posted by on September 8, 2011 at 2:25 am

In 5 days, the mega-hit television series “Survivor” will start its 23rd season, in the South Pacific – Specifically, in Upolu, Samoa.

I watched the first season of Survivor and about half of the second season before I became so disgusted with the show that I couldn’t bear to watch it any longer. I got a wild hair and started checking out one of the more recent seasons and it’s even more frustrating than the earlier ones.

Read after the break to find out why.

The first season of survivor started out ok. We had a bunch of people who got dropped on an island and started working on surviving. They had to do the “immunity challenges”, which would determine which team had to vote someone off of the island, and then someone would go away.

At least, that’s what it was in the beginning.

In fairly short order, though, people started with these “alliances”. Groups of people who would promise to protect each other when it came time for the “tribal council”, where one of the players would be voted out. So now, instead of the show being about who is the best at surviving and contributing to the “tribe” it becomes about who is the best politician.

In the first season, it wasn’t a major focus of the show but it did exist. In the second season, however, it got even worse. Then it wasn’t just about making alliances, it was also about the women on the show using flirtation and sexual advances to lure the men in to their circles so they could attempt to ensure their “survival” on the show.

Skip forward more than a dozen seasons and this steaming ball of wildebeest scat has reaches an entirely new level of suck.

By this point, people don’t even try to hide the fact that they are making alliances or that they are using their sex-appeal to sucker people in. They’re completely open and public about it. We’ve got people breaking off into pairs and talking about their strategic plans before they even break ground on their camps and try to set up shelters, for god’s sake.

The camera’s will follow people around while they are talking about these strategic alliances and, in some cases, will even let us see how some of the people are planning and plotting about back-stabbing the people they had previously established as “allies”. It’s as if they put 20 6th graders on an island and popularity contest broke out. The people will even talk about “alliances” other people have formed and how that’s going to effect them…

“Well, I know John and Jane have an alliance with Jack and Suzie so that means that unless my alliance with Tom, Dick and Harry works out with the alliance Tom has with Annie and Ted, I’m going to get voted off the island at the next tribal council”

SERIOUSLY?! What happened to SURVIVING?! Les Stroud should walk out of the woods, one day, and beat someone half to death with his harmonica. SURVIVE THAT, YA PUNK!

It’s not important who can hunt or fish or make fire out of 2 twigs, a grain of sand and half a busted sea shell. It doesn’t matter that one of the guys in a tribe can walk off into the jungle for 30 minutes and come back with a rack of lamb, 3 surf-n-turfs and a royale with cheese, large, with an extra side of fries and a sundae or that another player has managed to build a desalinization and filtering plant out of 2 coconuts, a palm frond, a handful of beach sand and a squid’s asshole, which is managing to pump out 50 liters of clean, fresh, de-ionized spring water per day, it’s about who can pucker up to the most butt and score the biggest number of blind, mindless followers to vote they way they want them to vote.

It became a political race, plain and simple and, in fact, the more useful or willing to contribute someone is, the more they are in danger of getting kicked off the island the first time their team loses a challenge…I’ve even heard them talk about it!

“Well, Joe is a natural leader and on the first day he set up and installed a functioning refrigeration unit and hydroelectric power generator, which is now providing the electricity we’re using to run a microwave oven and 42 inch plasma television, with a built in DVR – of course – so we don’t miss our shows during challenges, and that means he’s a threat to everyone’s chances of winning…We have to get him out of here as soon as possible!”

So, again, this show has nothing at all to do with surviving. It has nothing at all to do with a group of people working together for the good of the group and doing their best to make it. It has nothing at all do with the ideas and concepts of being a “Survivor” except that one person will eventually lied, cheated and backstabbed enough people to “survive” all of the tribal council “get off the island” meetings and become the winner of a million bucks.

How do people watch this crap?!

Hey, CBS, how about some truth in advertising and let’s change the name to “Smarmy Politician”. It’s much more accurate that way.

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  • Lusdrowski

    Disgusted with survivor this season!!    Whewre are you Jeff, stop what is going on.