I’m going to open this up by listing off the movies that A Christmas Story 2: Official Sequel (yes, that is the real title) director Brian Levant brought us over his bright streak of a career. Problem Child II. Beethoven. The Flintstones. Jingle All The Way (okay, hang on, this gets a pass). The Flintstones in Viva Rock Vegas. Snow Dogs. Are We There Yet? Scooby-Doo! The Mystery Begins. The Spy Next Door. Scooby-Doo! Curse of the Lake Monster. Do you see where I’m going with this?
Okay, I don’t need to wax romantic about how wonderful the original movie was, brought to us by a pre-Superbabies Bob Clark (RIP). Let’s just say there’s a reason why one of the Turner networks plays it for twenty-four hours straight. It’s a smart and nostalgic Christmas tale told from the point of view of a kid growing up in the forties. It’s like The Wonder YearsThat and you’ll shoot your eye out.
Now, let’s take that setting, mix it up slightly, redo it thirty years later, throw in Daniel Stern as Ralphie’s father (who actually narrated The Wonder Years) and make a movie that fits the exact same ‘this is the worst movie you have ever seen’ format that I thought had died on the spools of VHS cassettes during the mid-nineties. Nope, someone resurrected the ultra-crappy ‘kid-friendly video cash-in’ and decided to let A Christmas Story be the vessel for its parasitic ambitions.
Needless to say, we plan on viewing it as soon as it arrives on October 30th.