Ah, love. Boy meets girl. Boy pursues girl. Boy binds girl to table with plastic wrap in order to stab her to death with a giant knife… If you’re a fan of serial killer love, then read on for a spoilerific recap of Dexter Season 7 Episode 6, “Do the Wrong Thing.”
The episode opens with Dexter spying on Hannah from afar as he reads a book about the murders perpetrated by Hannah’s ex-boyfriend, Wayne Randall. As we learned last episode, Dexter seems to want to make Hannah his next victim, but as Dexter’s father Harry points out, Dexter has no proof that she’s still a killer. Dexter certainly has other things to worry about besides Hannah – Isaak Sirko’s vendetta against him, LaGuerta’s investigation into the Bay Harbor Butcher, and global warming to name a few – but Dexter only has eyes for Hannah.
So Dexter alters the blood report that proved that Hannah participated in the murders alongside Wayne Randall. Then he goes to see Hannah at her flower nursery to show her the altered report as a peace offering and apologize for calling her a murderer. He finds her burying a dead rabbit (she poisons them to keep them from killing her plants). They flirt as Hannah helps Dexter pick out a plant. Hannah talks about her dead husband and Dexter talks about his dead wife. They’re like a match made in a really creepy corner of heaven.
Back at Miami Metro, Deb hands some evidence over to Sal Price, a writer who is updating his book about the Wayne Randall murders. Dexter is worried that Sal will figure out that Dexter altered the blood report, so he questions Sal and finds out that Sal is working on a follow-up to his book where he claims that Hannah participated in the murders. While Sal tries to ask Deb out (she turns him down), Dexter breaks into Sal Price’s apartment and downloads files from Sal’s computer.
Meanwhile, LaGuerta is still investigating the Bay Harbor Butcher in secret. She tells Deb that she thinks they should look into old murder cases where the murderers disappeared – they may have been victims of the Bay Harbor Butcher. She wants to look into the case from Season 5 where a group of men killed women and then sealed their bodies in barrels. We know that Dexter and Lumen killed the men, but as far as the police are concerned the suspects all disappeared.
Meanwhile, Sirko wants out of jail, like, yesterday. George gives a bag of money to Quinn as a bribe (Quinn used to take bribes from George back when Quinn worked narcotics). Quinn refuses the bribe at first, but George threatens to send Quinn’s girlfriend Nadia off to work in a sex club in Dubai. Quinn has no choice and takes the bribe. Later, Quinn breaks into the evidence locker and steals the blood results that prove Isaak Sirko guilty of murder.
Dexter is at home going over the files he stole from Sal’s computer when Hannah shows up at his door with a new plant for his apartment. Her sudden appearance throws Dexter off his game, and he has a hard time processing her subtle come-ons. Dexter is saved by the bell, though, when Deb calls and demands that Dexter come over.
At Deb’s apartment, Deb tells Dexter about LaGuerta’s investigation into the Bay Harbor Butcher. In about 20 seconds, Deb miraculously puts together that not only did Dexter kill those men, he did so with the help of Lumen, the tenant who Dexter rented Rita’s old house to. At the end of Season 5, Deb stumbled upon Dexter and Lumen as they were about to kill Jordan Chase, but she let them go without getting their identities because she thought they were lovers seeking revenge. Finding out that Dexter and Lumen were working together – and that Dexter let Lumen live in his dead wife’s apartment so they could conveniently kill together – pisses Deb off and she kicks Dexter out.
The next day, Dexter finds a plant in Hannah’s nursery that induces a heart attack if ingested. Since Hannah’s husband and the previous owner of the nursery both died of heart attacks, Dexter figures that he has the proof against Hannah that he needs. Then Hannah shows up, and Dexter is so flustered when Hannah asks him why he keeps showing up to see her that Dexter blurts out, “I want to take you out… On a date.” Hannah admits that she ran away with Randall all those years ago because he promised to take her to a Christmas-themed amusement park where she could see the snow, but he never did. And with this awkward set-up out of the way, Hannah reluctantly agrees to go out with Dexter.
Back at Miami Metro, Deb finds out that Batista is unhappy and is thinking about retiring and buying a restaurant. Deb realizes that he own life sucks, so she agrees to go out with writer Sal Price. That night during their date, Sal shows Deb the evidence that he has collected proving that Hannah participated in at least one of the murders with Wayne Randall. His evidence directly contradicts Dexter’s findings, and Deb realizes that Dexter lied to her.
Meanwhile, Dexter takes Hannah out on a date to the Christmas-themed amusement park from Hannah’s story. The park is closed, but they break in and Dexter leads Hannah into a tent. He flips a switch and artificial snow falls, charming Hannah. As Hannah watches the snow, Dexter whips out his needle and injects Hannah in the neck…
Hannah wakes on Dexter’s table. She’s naked and wrapped in plastic. As Dexter waves his knife around, he explains that this is what he meant when he said he wanted to “take her out.” He’s going to kill her. Hannah seems entirely unfazed. She tells Dexter, rather huskily, “Do what you have to do.”
So Dexter raises the knife, there’s a big dramatic pause… and then Dexter cuts the plastic around Hannah’s body. She sits up, kisses Dexter, and then they start having the sex. It’s at this moment, if you listen closely, that you can hear one of the writers in the writer’s room shout, “Hey, what if Dexter has SEX ON HIS KILL TABLE?!”
Anyway, here endeth the episode. Next week, Dexter and Hannah go on an awkward second date to Chili’s Bar and Grill!