Dexter Season 7 Episode 9 Recap – “Helter Skelter”

When one door closes, another opens. So it went with last night’s 9th episode of Dexter, titled “Helter Skelter.” Read on for the spoiler-filled recap…

We begin with Dexter taking Hannah for a joyride on his boat, although there’s no real joy in this ride (see what I did there?). Hannah has been terrified of the water ever since her father nearly killed her by throwing her into a pool when she was a kid to teach her to swim. Dexter is happy to help Hannah face her fear, but he’s mum about his own fears.

Meanwhile, Evil British Dude™ Isaak Sirko finds out that the Brotherhood has sent two killers to finish him off. So Isaak goes to see Dexter and offers a deal: Since Dexter is so good at killing hit men, Isaak will call off his vendetta against Dexter if Dexter will in turn kill the two hit men after him. Dexter notices that for the first time that Isaak is scared, but he refuses Isaak’s offer.

Dexter arrives at a new crime scene involving a charred body in a car, which the creepy Fire Inspector declares a suicide (though Dexter disagrees). Dexter hasn’t spoken with Deb since last episode when she accidentally and quite awkwardly declared that she may or may not be in love with him. Dexter tells Deb that he understands how she feels. It’s logical, he says, considering everything they’ve been through together. They are the one constant in each other’s lives. Deb admits that she feels better now that the truth is out in the open. So do we, Deb. So do we.. Wait, eww, he’s her brother… No we don’t!

Anyway, Dexter returns to his apartment to find Isaak waiting for him. Apparently, Isaak has kidnapped Hannah and now he is threatening to kill her unless Dexter takes out the two hit men gunning for Isaak. Dexter agrees to Isaak’s demands for Hannah’s sake, but he plans to find a way to kill Isaak before the deal is done.

Dexter’s first stop is to ask Deb to call off the police following Isaak. He tells Deb everything, but Deb only agrees to help Dexter reluctantly. She warns Dexter that Hannah is a killer and he is in danger by being with her. Next, Dexter takes out the first hit man rather effortlessly by stabbing him at a shooting range. Boom, stab you’re dead.

Meanwhile, George tells the second hit man that in order to find Isaak, he should follow Dexter. George then tries to call Quinn, but Quinn doesn’t answer, so George has sex with Quinn’s stripper girlfriend, Nadia. When Quinn finds out, he goes postal, beats George up, and drags Nadia out of the strip club.

Meanwhile to that meanwhile, LaGuerta brings her theory that the Bay Harbor Butcher is alive to former Police Captain-turned-houseboat-livin’ alcoholic, Matthews. At first, Matthews tells LaGuerta to get bent, but later he agrees to help her investigation into the Bay Harbor Butcher if she agrees to reinstate him long enough so he can get his full pension. Oh, LaGuerta. You’re playing with fire, girl.

Dexter reports the first dead hit man to Isaak. He demands to talk to Hannah and Isaak sets up a video call, which Dexter uses to capture a picture of Hannah in hopes of figuring out her location. Hannah tells Dexter that she misses him, but Dexter is unable to respond in kind. This annoys Isaak, who calls Dexter out for being so unfeeling toward the woman he cares about. Isaak blames Dexter for killing his lover Viktor, but Dexter points out that Isaak is still responsible for sending Viktor to his death in the first place.

Dexter is called to another crime scene involving a second burn victim, which Dexter quickly proves was a homicide, much to the chagrin of the same creepy Fire Inspector. Thanks to the photo Dexter took of Hannah during their video chat, Dexter has a theory about her location. He asks a reluctant Deb to look for Hannah while he deals with the second hit man. Conveniently, the second hit man is watching Dexter at the crime scene. The hit man follows as Dexter leads him to a boat yard. Dexter lures the second hit man into a trap and Isaak shoots the hit man before he can react. For a moment, it seems as if Isaak is also going to shoot Dexter, but he puts his gun away. Isaak is indeed a man of his word.

Meanwhile, Hannah convinces Isaak’s bodyguard to let her cook fried green tomatoes. The fact that this dish is named after a sappy chick movie should’ve clued the bodyguard in that this was a bad idea. Hannah uses the opportunity to poison the bodyguard’s food. A struggle ensues and the Bodyguard stabs Hannah before he dies. Following Dexter’s tip, Deb shows up just in time to call an ambulance and save Hannah’s life.

Dexter and Isaak prepare to part ways, but while Dexter stays to clean up the hit man’s blood, George appears, shoots Isaak in the stomach, and then runs off. Dying, Isaak asks Dexter for one last kiss… I mean favor. Dexter takes Isaak out on his boat to the spot where he dumped Viktor’s body back in episode one. Isaak marvels that Dexter is so fearless when it comes to death, but so terrified in matters of love. Dexter admits that he finds death soothing because he can control it. But with Hannah he has no control. Isaak felt the same way until Viktor helped him be who he really was. Then Isaak dies and we change his moniker from Evil British Dude to Sappy British Dude™. Dexter tosses Isaak’s body overboard.

Dexter arrives at the hospital, where Deb has just finished grilling Hannah about her kidnapping. Hannah doesn’t seem to buy Deb’s story that she found Hannah by following an anonymous tip, but Deb insists that she was doing her job. She saved Hannah for herself, not for Dexter.

After Deb leaves, Dexter admits to Hannah that he was as terrified that he wouldn’t see her again as he was when he was a child and he saw his mother murdered. Dexter tells Hannah that he doesn’t know what their relationship is yet, but he feels safe with her.

On next week’s episode, Dexter and Hannah struggle with moving in together. Can they go shopping at Pottery Barn without killing each other? Tune in to find out!