A Spouse’s Response to Skyrim

Posted by on November 11, 2011 at 11:40 am

I’m a woman and I do game, a little, but The Elder Scrolls is my husband’s thing. So let me tell you how I prepared for this release.

My house is cleaned, my freezer is stocked with pizzas and burritos that can easily be thrown into the oven. The cats have a stock of food, the computer is hooked to the 40” LCD, and I have the desk. The laundry is done and dishes are clean, there really is nothing left to do except wait….

Sometime today UPS will drop by our home and deliver the newest member of the Elder Scrolls’ family. Skyrim will appear in all it’s glory and will be lovingly installed on the PC. The husband will be relaxed in the recliner, keyboard and mouse (or perhaps the controller) poised and ready to go and then the most miraculous thing will happen….

He’ll shut up.

With the exceptional, “OMG! Honey did you see that?” or “Holy Shit!” I look forward to a peaceful few days, where I can leave my husband in front of the TV and I don’t have to worry about him messing the house up, dirtying the dishes or piling up the laundry. I will be able to sit at my own computer and accomplish the next best-seller while he slays dragons or bandits. With the occasional drink refill, and dropping off a plate of pizza, in which he’ll grope blindly for, as long as the game is uninterrupted, my life will be easy until he returns from the world of dragons and quests. So other spouses of Skyrim, rejoice with me, as long as you prepared, life shall be good.

Word of advice from a spouse that has gone through this before. Keep a bottle of air freshener near by, if he starts to smell, just spray him down. If he needs to relieve himself, point him towards the bathroom, and claim that if you help (like Rob suggests) that you’ll only get in the way and it would take longer than him pausing the game. Finger foods are your friend, and make sure that the pets also steer clear of the gaming area.

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  • Vinay Kapadia

    You are awesome.

  • Sandman

    If you have 1 or more young kids you would not rejoice at this lol

    • Info

      Lol true… Taking care of the kids while the other sits and play definitely is not the best way of relaxing :)

  • AnonCoward

    Wow, at our house the game has actually generated a pile of laundry and dishes in front of the TV. I am jealous.

  • True love at work right there!