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What’s With Everyone Buying In To The Facebook Hoaxes?

Posted by on January 2, 2013 at 10:21 pm
One is born every minute, right?

One is born every minute, right?

I’m going to come clean with you…I hardly spend any time on Facebook which means I certainly spend less time than I should, being in a position such as mine. When I am on Facebook, it is usually for one of a very few reasons. I’m either there to see what my actual friends are doing, or to see what kind of drivel my Facebook “friends” are sharing, or to laugh at the people on my friends list who buy in to the various (and numerous) hoaxes which constantly fly around the site.

This article is about that last category.

I don’t know what the first Facebook hoax was but I do know what the most prevalent is. It’s the one where people post disclaimers saying “my content is my content and no other entity is to use my content without my express consent” etc, etc…I see that one popping up all the time.

Quotations WARNING-any person and/or institution and/or Agency of any governmental, state, city structure including but not limited to the United States Federal Government, corporations, banks, collection agencies and their entities using or monitoring/using this website contents or any of its associated websites, you do NOT have my permission to utilize ANY of my profile information nor any of the content contained herein including, but not limited to my photos, and/or the comments made about my photos or any other “picture” art posted on my profile. You are hereby notified that you are STRICTLY PROHIBITED from disclosing, copying, distributing, disseminating or taking any other action, legal or otherwise, against me, my family, my relatives, my friends in regards to this profile and contents herein. The foregoing prohibitions also apply to your employee(s), agent(s), student(s) or any other personnel under your direction or control. The contents of this profile are private and legally privileged and confidential information, and the violation of my personal privacy is punishable by law.

Here’s a tip for all of you out there who buy in to that one. The EULA for Facebook requires you to explicitly consent to exactly what you’re saying you don’t consent to and makes everything posted on Facebook their property…Including that fake disclaimer. Also, you’re on Facebook…Privacy? Really?

I also get a kick out of the ones which claim that you can get to hidden settings by hovering over pictures people have posted. Then right clicking on this or that, then choosing advanced settings blah blah blah. Here’s a tip for you guys : There’s no such thing as hidden settings. Get over it.

Then there are the virus warnings – “Oh my god, if someone named so-and-so sends you a friend request, don’t accept it. I did and as soon as I hit the accept button I got a bunch of popups and porn on my screen and then my virus scanner said I had a bunch of viruses on my computer!!”. That’s not what happened at all. What happened is that you were looking at some shady Russian porn site, then Facebook said you had a notification. You changed tabs and accepted the friend request just as that shady porn site was finishing dumping half a gig of malware onto your computer, after which the windows and porn started popping up, then you thought you could cover it up so your parents / husband / wife / kids would find out about the freaky tranny porn you’ve been watching and you posted on Facebook. Unfortunately, most of your under-intelligent friends believe that crap and proceed to forward it to the 38,491 friends they’ve acquired through farmville and all of a sudden, it’s breaking news on Fox.

And this one…this one takes the cake. I got a share on my wall today. It was a picture of a girl with a cat laying across the top of her boobs. The cat was surrounded by a box and the caption on the photo claimed that if you commented with the number 2, the cat would go away, presumably letting you see the woman’s cleavage…

HUNDREDS of people had replied with the number 2.

How friggin gullible do you have to be? Seriously. There is NO WAY that Facebook can edit a photo based on your response to that photo in the comments section. It’s not going to happen. Stop commenting.

So I will go about my business, looking at more and more hoaxes on Facebook and laughing at the people who fall for them. In the meantime, I would suggest thinking before you all simply default into believing this crap. You’ll feel better in the morning.

Also, I know I shouldn’t use the word gullible. I know it’s not in the dictionary and isn’t a proper word but it’s the only one that fits. Sue me.

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