The Sims 4 To Be Released In 2014? Whoopidy Doo!

Posted by on May 7, 2013 at 9:25 am
Like The Sims 3, only...Ok, Like The Sims 3

Like The Sims 3, only… Ok, like The Sims 3

Yesterday, Electronic Arts sent out a press release letting us all know that they are planning to release The Sims 4 in 2014. N wrote an article earlier talking about the fact that he never really enjoyed The Sims.

I have a slightly different take on the franchise.

Look, here’s how it boils down. I’ve played the three previous Sims games. Why? Because I had to. Whether it was for a review or so I could get a nagging female off my case about it, I’ve been sucked into the black, cold, miserable abyss that is “The Sims”. I have more than a few issues with this series.

  • First: how the hell does it take my Sim fifteen minutes to get up, walk fifteen feet, take a leak and wash his hands?
  • Second: an hour and a half to make and eat waffles in the morning?
  • Third: it’s impossible to put the Sim on a routine because their needs require 36 hours per day of micromanaging and coddling to keep them from going nuts.
  • Fourth: if they have to go to work for several hours each day, why can’t I watch them do their thing?
  • Fifth: how do they age so quickly?

All of this crap points to a major issue with time management. Maxis can’t seem to figure out how to make the Sim act in accordance with a time scale that is even remotely possible in this universe. I know some of you fanboy types are going to spout off at me about how this is a person management game and that managing those needs and time and all that crap is the entire point, but if that’s the case, this is just stupid.

Then there’s the fact that each Sims game has been an update of the last Sims game, with a different camera angle and a couple of add ons. Then, of course, they got to The Sims 3 and added so many expansion packs that Donald Trump went bankrupt again trying to buy them all.

Now they’re going to release The Sims 4 (another in a very long line of sequels, because that’s all EA seems to be capable of for the last several years) and I’m under the distinct impression that this one is just going to be more of the same. This isn’t even okay when “the same” is also “good”, but this nonsensical micromanagement shit has got to go. At least make it run in real time, guys.

Yet another tired IP from the company voted “worst company in America” two years in a row. When are people going to stop buying the same fucking game fifteen times?

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